Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
