they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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