Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
