I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
