I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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