Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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