it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize