i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
