Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
