Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Randomize
