sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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