it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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