similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize