I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
