Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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