Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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