We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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