Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize
