I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
