therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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