Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize