...so i touched it.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
