I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
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