I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
