Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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