Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Randomize
