i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
