So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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