what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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