with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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