You're so nebulous sometimes
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
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