I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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