Do you still have your period?
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
