sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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