How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
