im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
