Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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