It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
