Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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