You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
