She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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