That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
