hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
