You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
