This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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