That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
