I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize