I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Couch. On fire.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
