Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
