I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
